Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Another One Bites The Dust

This news came to me via an instant message from my cousin. Very sad. Several of Heath's films I found to be very enjoyable, he had a dynamic screen presence and that oh so adorable smile and beautiful eyes. Tragic.

The speculation was first drug related and now is suicide.

I can't even imagine.

How you do you get to the point where you have nothing to live for? Where you have no regard for the people who love and care about you and you feel trapped and alone? Is it psychological? Is it environmental? Is it circumstance or self inflicted? It is action or reaction? Either to be weak or desperate or devoid of life within your life to take you over that edge of reason.... it's pitiful, cowardly and even more tragically - Preventable.

Heath has a 2 year old daughter who will suffer greatly for his actions. The sins of the father visiting through the third generation and so on... the laws of God prevail. Poor child. Thank God for mercy and grace, I hope she reaches for out it at some point in her life.

No man is an island.

I love the message in the movie "It's a Wonderful Life". Every choice we make, effects those around us, either directly or indirectly. Wow, that makes me cringe when I take a look at my actions. My imperfections and bad choices alters and/or effects the course of my loved ones lives and beyond.

So, although Heath may have felt that to take his life was the best course of action or he carelessly handled his life and accidentally ended it, there will be many who will live out the repercussions of his death.

Hollywood's latest victim ladies and gentleman. A victim of the pressure the industry brings. Fame, Power, Money..... loneliness, fatigue, greed.

Was it worth it in the end? I think not.

So long Heath Ledger, maybe the end of your life will be the wake up call that helps another life start living.

The Queen.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

The Revenge of the Thinker!

So I've spent this week, thinking about how I'm not supposed to be thinking. See, obsessive/compulsive if you ask me.

So on a whim, here are 10 random thoughts going through my head right now....

1. I hate not being properly compensated for my job.

2. I need to get some more face wash.

3. I wonder if Joel will ever reply to my email.

4. I'm hungry.

5. I don't want to work.

6. Why does "Happy Hump Day" always sound dirty to me!?

7. How do I stop thinking about what I'm not supposed to be thinking about?

8. What are we going to do tomorrow for KidzNet?

9. Why are there 3 pimples on my chin, when I just got a facial?!

10. gray hair.

Random right?
I'm the true definition of a scatterbrain. ugh.

Happy HUMP Day people. Let's hope we make it to the other side.

Queen Catherella

Monday, January 14, 2008

Thinking is Over Rated

I have the worse tenancy to over think things. My brain is like this big machine whose wheels never stop turning.

Sometimes, I most likely think my way out of some great opportunities, because I think so much and so hard about it that the opportunity passes me by.

I bet I even think my way out of the spontaneity of life. I think so thoroughly regarding certain situations, and try to be a step ahead that I don't leave room for surprises or the natural course of life.

I'm the one who tries to figure everything out before everyone else. I will actually be sitting there listening to a joke while my brain is trying to figure out the punchline before the joke is over. Pathetic and a bit annoying if you ask me.

I've got to come to the realization that despite my huge brain power and the nagging urge to think too much..., my ways are not God's ways or better, He's ways are not my ways, and just when I think I've got it all figured out, things never turn out like they did in my head.

So a good friend of mine told me very recently, just let it go. Whatever you are overthinking, just let it go. There's no point in wasting your thoughts on things you don't have control over the outcome anyways. And once you let go, you are ready to get your solution, your blessing, your answer, or whatever it is that is making you (me) think so long and hard.

So, I'm attempting to do just that. As a habitual "thinker" it's way easier said than done, in fact it borderlines on the impossible. I will definitely need God's help on this one.

Thought process shut down in 3, 2, 1.........


Tuesday, January 08, 2008

The Elephant in the Room....

I normally don't blog about particular people in my life.

And believe me, there are many people who are as important to me as breathing. I just can't exist without them.

But after much bugging, I feel the elephant in the room won't go away, until I do. (I know he's one of my newest blog readers and it doesn't hurt to give his large ego a bit more of a boost... ha ha ha!... or does it?) I've threatened several times to write about him and I guess now the time has come... ha ha ha

So who is this person?

His name is Joel.

I've known Joel since I was a wee babe of 19 years old, however it wasn't until I was 21 that we actually became friends. He was older, wiser and someone I didn't think I'd actually find common ground with. I was a kid searching for my life's purpose and he had a career, a mortgage and a 10 year plan.

(He sounds so old doesn't he?)
(Don't worry Joel, I won't give your elderly age away!)

If I believed in accidents, I'd say we became friends accidentally, thrown together on a Magic Mountain trip one warm September day. However, I know better than that and I know that God blessed me with a friend for life that day.

So for the past 11 plus years, we've shared ups and downs, absences and reunions, laughs and tears. And a little craziness thrown in for kicks and giggles.
(it would seriously take a book to recall all we've gone through!)

The most important thing about Joel for me is that I trust him completely and I know that his advice and criticisms are always in my best interest. He's usually the first person I call when I'm feeling a bit blue. I only hope I can be half the friend to him that he's been to me.

Joel is a man of integrity, honesty and values and I am blessed and proud to call him my friend.

So Joel, here's to you, my friend, whom I love so very much... and here's to 30 or more great years ahead of us! (that is, until your mind goes and you don't even remember your own name, let alone mine! ha ha ha!)

My wish to you - Blogger World, is that you have or find someone like this in your life.... and when you do, hang on for ride!

~The Queen~

Friday, January 04, 2008

A Crazy New Year's Eve Indeed!

Oh my word... when the clock struck midnight and a new year started, the people of South Coast Worship Center were just a bit bonkers. I don't know if it was the excitement of the new year, the anticipation of greatness, the explosive response to confetti and martinelli's or just plain exhaustion.

Whatever the reason may be, it was a mad house for the first 10 minutes of 2008.

Yes, these people really are crazy.

Yes, these people really are churchgoers.

Yes, these people really are what makes my world complete.

Here's a video I took about 20 seconds after the new year started.

The crazy couples kissing are my Pastor and his wife and my Brother and his wife.

The rest, well, I just call them family.....


May it be all you can imagine and more!